The sports department realignment is complete, and I’ve been assigned my new rivalry partner. It’s Sally Jenkins. Sally and I will meet twice a year, home and away, in a sort of festivus that will include feats of strength: who can open a bottle of wine the fastest, plus, I don’t know, maybe a spelling bee and grammar quiz. She’ll kick my, ah, behind. I’m hoping we can throw in some wheat probing and grave dowsing so I have a fair shot. But chances are we’ll just wind up in some bar, gossiping and swapping titles of good books we’ve read.
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